Just Watching – August 2018

As I wind my way down life’s road toward a 90th birthday a number of things are on my mind, three in particular.  They organize under familiar headings.  Can you fill in the blanks?

  • Something __ __ __, 2) Something __ __ __, 3) Something__ __ __ __ __ __ __ __.

#1  Something __ __ __.

Last Monday an e-mail popped up on my computer.  It was from an old acquaintance.  It’s not that he is old.  Not at all.  He’s maybe seventeen.  Some years ago I was his once-a-week-elementary-school-lunchtime mentor.  He was such a little kid, a recent immigrant with an electric mind, wild imagination, curiosity about everything and boundless energy.  For seven years we met and talked each week about whatever was on his mind.  Actually for the most part he talked and I listened.  He thought I was a paid school employee doing my duty rather than a volunteer who wanted to be his friend. 

I lost contact with him when he moved out of elementary school into High School.  Through teachers I knew I was somewhat aware of how he was doing.  Not too good.  I had lost weekly one-on-one contact. He didn’t respond to the e-mails.  In time I stopped sending them but I did keep him in my prayers – and waited.   

Through the grapevine I heard he was making some poor choices, had hooked up with a bad crowd and was starting to dabble with drugs.  In time heard he had gotten into trouble and was transferred to a remedial education program.  He also broke a leg and was immobilized for about a month.  I now know that while his body was inactive, not so his mind.  Alone and at home he remembered among other things our hours together and finally he decided to write me. 

His letter opened with, “Not a day goes by that you aren’t in my thoughts.”  From that point on it only got better.  In a long posting he reported on his life since last we had talked and apologized for letting our contact flag.  He quoted Isaiah 4:10 (would you believe it!) and closed by saying he would understand if I didn’t want to contact him anymore.  His wrap?  “…you will always be in my heart dear friend.”  Oh my!  In a few lines something very old re-budded and blossomed anew.

Reading his letter my mind went back to Dr. Walter Wente a teacher whom I met when I was barely a teen.  He was unbelievably patient with both me and others like me during our challenging early teen years but he never gave up on us as we were growing up. 

If I was the kind of mentor my young friend needed as he was growing it was because I had had such a great one in my teens.  So much that has been old in my past became old gold.

# 2  From what’s old to what is  __ __ __.

For Audie and me on the edge of our 90s the next word refers to new housing and a new take on life. 

It has become increasingly clear to us that we had to find a senior’s residence for our future because we needed to do less cooking (but more of the same good eating); less tending our living quarters up (while maintaining the same life standards Audie has set over the years); less got-to’s and more get-to’s (sustaining our connection with family, old friends and other familiar connections).  After checking out many possibilities we chose to make Windsor Park Manor in Carol Stream, Illinois our next stop on our life’s road.  We sought and found.   

Our children, grandchildren and friends have all been enormously helpful in the search for our Shangri La.  One of the lessons I learned as we searched is that learning how to accept help that is offered and that, stubborn German that I am, I need.  Change is a constant that means I need constant assistance in facing it.  Many things I once did easily I can no longer do but a great day dawned when I recognized that the world is full of people who are as eager to help me as I once delighted in helping others.   What goes around really does come around – if we let it.

Really believing that readies me for the tidal wave of surprising new things from many surprising corners of life with which God blesses His older “children” – including things that did not originate with us, like this one, ker-splash!:

#3   Something __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __.

Did you say “borrowed”?  Right you are.

For years Rich and I have been beating the bushes on behalf the joy of ageing.  Make that JOY.  Opposing almost all we have been saying are the endless line up of products guaranteed to make you look young again.  Why would I want to do that?  It took me a long time to develop those wrinkles, crow’s feet, silver threads among the gold.  Making my way through the teens and twenties into my thirties, middle age and leading up to an empty nest has been a long, tough battle through adolescence.  Don’t tell me all there is to look forward to are black balloons, over-the-hill banners, and moaning about the deteriorating quality of life after our 40th or 50th birthday.    Help!  And help there is from the AARP, no less.

Whether AARP borrowed from a sturdy but small band who have been fighting the battle against joy-less ageing or they from us a battle line is forming taking their cue from the traditional Hispanic celebration of quinceanera (marking a young lady’s 15th birthday) by pushing for a new holiday they call Cincuentaneros which celebrates one’s 50th birthday as one of life’s highlights, a door to more of what life has to offer in the great years yet to come.  Mark it.  I’ll have more about this “borrowed” holiday in the months to come.

Blessings on your days.  May they be filled with God’s goodness that come to you  as something old, something new or something borrowed.  One thing for sure, when He holds you in His even what looks blue will be beautiful.

Charlie